Why me?
by Dizzykins
Summary: Kyuubi, Naruto's elder brother, has once again dragged the helpless blonde to the annual 'Family New Years Party'. Little does he know that this could be the best, or the worst, he has ever been to. KibaNaru, SasuNaru, others naru.
1. PrologueTypeThing

**Disclaimer: **I wish I did… but I don't… but my lifelong dream is to own Naru-chan's ass.

**A/N:** I have so many ideas running through my head right now it's not funny! I know, I should be updating one of the others, but really, I needed something new and different! Hopefully 'That Dobe is MINE' will be updated next, then Trapped, but only after I do the next chapter of this. I have already started on them so they will be done very soon! Hope you guys enjoy this prologue-type-thing, next chap should be up shortly.

**Warning:**Yaoi/Shonen Ai, Smut, Cussing, Slight OOCness

**This fic is dedicated to one of my favourite authors on SandmanandKitsune! I told you I would dedicate one to you!!!**

* * *

Why me?  
The Prologue-Type-Thing

_Ugh, not again._ A blonde-haired, tanned 16 year-old whinged and whined mentally as he was dragged to a family New Years Eve party by his older, red-haired brother, Kyuubi. Their whole family was going to be there, and their friends, and their friends' friends and so on. Most of the time the two brothers didn't know even half the people there.

"Stop whining, Kit."

The blonde turned to his brother, pouting.

"I wasn't-"

"Yes you were, in your head! You know I can read your mind, 'Ruto. I'm just awesome like that."

The red head smiled at his pouting brother and dragged him up the steps of their aunt and uncle's house and knocked on the door.

"Please, no Kyuubi, please, I'm begging you, don't make me go in there! I don't want Tsunade fussing and Jiraiya asking me to help him write his stupid porno novels-"

"What was that I heard about 'stupid porno novels' Naruto?" The door had been flung open and standing in the doorway was an angry-looking, grey-haired old man.

"Nothing Jiraiya-sama-"

"What have I told you Kyuubi? Call me Jiraiya. We are _family_."

"_Unfortunately_," The blonde grumbled under his breath as they were ushered inside.

* * *

**Teehee, hope you like, should post the next chapter within a few hours, depending on the New Years celebrations… or lack of New Years celebrations… Honestly, this is one of the most boring New Years ever… Hence my being on the computer writing a new fic.**

**R&R**


	2. Confessions Of A Drunken Aunt

**Disclaimer: **Well… I own heaps of Naruto merchandise… but no Naruto characters… I SHALL OWN ONE, ONE DAY! I SWEAR ON THE POWER OF YOUTH! GAI-SENSEI, BE PROUD OF ME!

**A/N:** Here it is; the first actual chapter! Hope you guys like! Now onto writing 'That Dobe Is MINE!' for me.

**Warning:**Yaoi/Shonen Ai, Smut, Cussing, Slight OOCness

**READ THIS BEFORE YOU READ FURTHER!  
**Okay, you see, I live in Australia where it is summer over the Christmas/New Years break, so it would feel weird for me to write this fic so that it is set in winter, therefore, this fic is set in summer.

* * *

**Last Chapter:**

"_Please, no Kyuubi, please, I'm begging you, don't make me go in there! I don't want Tsunade fussing and Jiraiya asking me to help him write his stupid porno novels-"_

"_What was that I heard about 'stupid porno novels' Naruto?" The door had been flung open and standing in the doorway was an angry-looking, grey-haired old man._

"_Nothing Jiraiya-sama-"_

"_What have I told you Kyuubi? Call me Jiraiya. We are family."_

"Unfortunately_," The blonde grumbled under his breath as they were ushered inside.

* * *

_

Why me?  
Chapter 1: Confessions Of A Drunken Aunt

"By the way, brat, you're late. Everyone is already here." Jiraiya said as he led the two out to the back yard. It wasn't really like a backyard though. The size of it was more like a football field, though, with this many people in it, you couldn't really tell.

"Why _Naru-chan_, I didn't think you'd be here. Where've you been man?" Asked a scruffy brunette teen about the same age as Naruto.

"Kiba, if you _ever_ call me that again I'll kill you. And for your information Kyuubi stopped off to get some alcohol, not that we need any _more_ here. I'm sure Tsunade wouldn't mind sharing some of hers for _once_. Wait, what are you doing here? Who brought you?"

The brunette rolled his eyes before looking back to the blonde, "Everyone knows that your New Years parties are pretty much open to anyone so I just invited myself, _Naru-chan_," He smirked a little before turning to look at a few people over the other side of the yard, ignoring the blonde's rants about 'not being a girl'. The brunette scowled a little before he continued talking.

"Your aunt, Tsunade, decided to invite a few people from school for you. She knows how much you hate these parties so she wanted you to know a few more people this year. But she doesn't really know your friends groups so she invited the Uchihas, Hyuugas, Sabakus and Sai, along with Sakura, Ino, Shino, Shikamaru, Chouji, Lee and Haku. Man, I don't even know _why_ Itachi, Sasuke, Neji and Gaara came. Well, I know why Sai came at least. It's probably to either hit on you or insult your dick."

Naruto watched the groups at the other side of the yard. Sakura and Ino were both clinging to Sasuke, who was just glaring at them as usual. Neji, Sai and Gaara were 'talking' (if you could call it that) to eachother and the others were just chatting to eachother normally, or as normal as they could be seeing as usually they don't all hang out together. But one thing kept ringing in his ears; 'I don't even know _why_ Itachi, Sasuke, Neji and Gaara came.'

_Why _did_ they come? Only one way to find out I guess_, Naruto thought to himself, before grabbing Kiba and rushing off towards the groups, leaving Kyuubi behind to do his own thing.

"Hey, dude, what's so important that you have to grab me and drag me?" Naruto relinquished his hold on the brunette.

"Heh, sorry Kiba, I just wanna find out what Sasuke-teme(1) and his 'friends' are doing here."

"Whatever Naruto, but you can do it without me. That Gaara guy freaks me out."

Naruto rolled his eyes at his friend before walking straight up to the group.

"Hey, you guys," The four turned to look blankly at the blonde, while Ino and Sakura just glared at the blonde, "Why did you come to this, uh, get-together?"

"Well, we could leave our little _Naru-chan_ all on his lonesome, so we decided to come for company." Sai smirked at the blonde.

"Hey, Sakura-chan, lets go get some food," Ino suggested quickly, she didn't want to be in the middle when the blonde blew up. Neither did Sakura. They both quickly hurried off.

"Why the hell does everyone keep calling me 'Naru-chan'? **I am not a girl**!" Naruto's face was turning red out of anger while Sasuke, Neji, and Sai couldn't help but smirk at the blonde's reaction. Gaara just stared at him.

He was _definitely_ fragile enough to be a girl, with his small figure and slender features. Anyone could _easily_ mistake him for a girl if he wore a skirt. Kiba had made Naruto test it out once by dressing him in a maid's costume and sending him into the Konoha mall. It had had terrifying results, ending with Naruto being chased out of the mall by a horde of horny men. Kiba had _never _let him live it down.

"Huh? Why Naru-chan, of _course_ you're not a girl, you just _look_ like one, brat." The blonde spun around angrily to see Tsunade holding an empty bottle of sake. She looked like she could hardly stand. _Honestly, she's drunk already?_

"It's _obvious_ that you're a guy. Seriously," She swayed drunkenly towards Sai, "I changed his nappies when he was younger and kami;(2) there is no way on earth that he could be a girl. He's got a _huge_ penis," By now Sasuke and Neji looked as close to laughing as was possible for the Hyuugas and Uchihas, whereas Sai wasn't as good an actor. He burst out laughing. Gaara's eyes just laughed.

Naruto was steadily growing redder and redder. _Well, at least Sai can't insult my penis anymore._

"Tsunade-baa-chan(3)," Naruto managed to growl out through his teeth, "I think it's time you went _inside_."

"Nonsense brat, I was just getting to the good bit," She turned back to the smirking teens, ignoring Naruto's ongoing pleas to go inside, and continued, "He is one of the _gayest_ guys-"

"Tsunade-sama!" A dark-haired woman came running up to the drunken lady and began leading her inside while calling apologies back to Naruto, "I'm _so_ sorry. She wasn't supposed to leave my sight. I hope she didn't cause too much trouble, Naruto-kun."

The blonde just glared at the ground. Kiba had heard what had been said and he sat there in the bushes gaping. _Sounds like Sai has been wrong the whole time. But… Naruto, gay? Man, I thought he was like the straightest person at the school. Wait, doesn't he like Sakura-chan? Tch. As good ole' Shikamaru would say, 'so troublesome'._

Sai immediately calmed down after Tsunade mentioned Naruto being gay. In fact, he mentally jumped up and down on the spot out of joy. Sasuke, Neji and Gaara just stood there, mentally gaping at the blonde, but they didn't really show it on the outside. Kiba couldn't stand it anymore. He jumped out of the bushes and dragged the blonde inside.

"Oww, Kibaaaa, let go!" Naruto whined as they reached an empty bedroom. Kiba quickly shut the door behind him and let the blonde go.

"You _are_ gay, aren't you?" The blonde nodded while looking at the ground. Kiba continued, "Kami, I have so many questions Naru-chan!" At this Naruto growled. Kiba just continued, ignoring the growl, "Why did you say you liked Sakura? Who do you like? Why didn't you tell me? Who do you like? Oh, wait, did I ask that already? How long have you been gay?"

Naruto rubbed his temples, "Eetto(4), I said I liked Sakura because I thought I did, but I don't, obviously. I didn't tell you because I thought you'd hate me… or go crazy like you are now. I've been gay… I don't know how long. And why the hell do you want to know who I like?!"

Kiba rubbed the back of his neck, "Heh, uh, I don't know-"

"I haven't seen you with a girl like… _ever-_"

"Well, you see, I just don't like any of the-"

"And you never even talk about girls-"

"Maybe I just never felt like it-"

"And there was that time when-"

"**All right**! You caught me! I'm gay! Do you need a full, written out confession or something?!"

Naruto laughed nervously, then smiled, "Heh, don't worry about it Kiba. I just wanted to know. Well, I _did _already know, but I just wanted to hear it from you."

"Okay then." Kiba nodded, slightly annoyed.

"So… Who do _you_ like?" Naruto asked in a mock-female voice.

"None of _your_ business _Naru-chan_."

Kiba smirked but then tumbled backwards as the blonde pounced on him. They began rolling all over the floor, struggling to pin the other. The two continued rolling around, laughing, and eventually Naruto pinned the brunette beneath him, smirking at his triumph.

"Mwahaha, I got you Kiba. I told you _not _to call me 'Naru-chan'"

The brunette smirked from underneath Naruto, "Why _Naru-chan_, I knew you were gay but isn't this a bit fast?"

The blonde blushed, realising his position above the brunette. He gave the dog-boy a hard punch in the shoulder before jumping off him, laughing.

"Ouch-"

Jiraiya walked into the bedroom, taking in the curious sight before him, "Oi, brats, get out of my room!"

* * *

"Dobe(5), where have you been?"

The blonde and the dog-boy had just emerged from the crowd of people and were now standing directly in front of a certain Uchiha.

"Why do you care all of a sudden, teme?" Naruto perked his eyebrow up at the raven.

"Because we all just got this 'confession' from your aunt about you being gay-"

"And that you have a huge-"

Naruto slammed his hand over Sai's mouth. Everyone seemed surprised by the blonde's sudden reaction.

_Well that was certainly different_, thought the elder Uchiha who was watching the group from a table near the house._ Usually Naru-chan is very slow with his reflexes. Whatever is going on must be good. I'd better go find out._

As Itachi got closer he could hear the blonde's voice. His voice was deep and he was speaking in a quite serious tone. _Also very different. What has my otouto_(6)_ done now?_

"Stop asking questions! Urgh, I'm not going to answer you here," Naruto thought for a minute before turning around and walking towards the house, signalling for them to follow. They did. And so did Itachi.

_This is getting _very_ interesting._

_

* * *

_

(1) Teme - Bastard  
(2) Kami - God  
(3) Tsunade-Baa-Chan - Practically he is calling her 'Granny Tsunade'  
(4) Eetto - It's just something you say when you don't know what to say, like 'um'  
(5) Dobe - It means 'dead last' but no one says that, so it is practically 'loser'  
(6) Otouto(also spelt 'ototo') - Younger brother

**Okay, I apologise for the shortness (I didn't want to keep you guys waiting) and if there are any mistakes I apologise for them too, but seriously, this fic is slightly hard to write. Please read and review!**


	3. Prove It

**Disclaimer: **:( I want Naru-chan.

**A/N:** Oh my GOD, I am SOOO sorry I didn't update sooner! I skipped year 9, right, and year 10 has been really stressful for me, so I haven't had time to update! But here it is! Finally!

**Warning:** Yaoi/Shonen Ai, Smut, Cussing, Slight OOCness

**READ THIS BEFORE YOU READ FURTHER!  
**Okay, you see, I live in Australia where it is summer over the Christmas/New Years break, so it would feel weird for me to write this fic so that it is set in winter, therefore, this fic is set in summer.

* * *

"_Why do you care all of a sudden, teme?" Naruto perked his eyebrow up at the raven._

_"Because we all just got this 'confession' from your aunt about you being gay-" _

_"And that you have a huge-" _

_Naruto slammed his hand over Sai's mouth. Everyone seemed surprised by the blonde's sudden movement. _

Well that was certainly different_, thought the elder Uchiha who was watching the group from a table near the house. _Usually Naru-chan is very slow with his reflexes. Whatever is going on must be good. I'd better go find out.

_As Itachi got closer he could hear the blonde's voice. His voice was deep and he was speaking in quite a serious tone._ Also very different. What has my otouto done now?

_"Stop asking questions! Urgh, I'm not going to answer you here," Naruto thought for a minute before turning around and walking towards the house, signalling for them to follow. They did. And so did Itachi. _

This is getting very interesting.

* * *

Why me?  
Chapter 2: Prove It

The group trailed behind the blonde through the house. _Honestly, why does this house have to be so big_, thought Kiba.

Naruto lead them into a bedroom, though it wasn't like the one Kiba and Naruto had been in earlier; this one was much bigger. There was a huge bed in the centre of the room with bright orange covers and you could see two doors off to the side of the room; one was a walk-in-closet and the other was an ensuite bathroom. There were also two large black sofas and a television just across the other side of the room from them.

"Um, Naru-chan, is this your bedroom for when you stay over here?"

The blonde nodded.

"Sit." Naruto ordered, standing in front of the television, pointing to the sofas. Everyone raised their eyebrows at this and obediently sat down. The blonde looked down at their faces glancing over each one. Sasuke, Neji, Gaara, Sai, Kiba, Itachi… wait! Itachi?!

Naruto jumped up and pointed at the elder Uchiha, screaming, "What the hell?! Itachi?!"

All heads turned to the end of the couch where Itachi was sitting. Sasuke glared. Itachi just sat there with an innocent look plastered on his face.

"Why Naru-chan, I'm hurt to think that you wouldn't want me here."

Sasuke scoffed. Naruto grumbled at the name, trying not to scream at the Uchiha.

"Why the hell are you here, _aniki_?" Sasuke asked calmly, though there was a hint of poison in his voice.

"I saw Naru-chan being serious. It looked like he was using his brain for once. It _intrigued _me."

Sasuke shrugged. That answer was plausible, though, it did remind him a bit of Orochimaru. Sasuke shuddered at the thought.

"Kami! Why must everyone call me Naru-chan?! And I am not dumb!" Itachi raised his eyebrows at this. "I think _Tsunade_ just made it obvious how much of a _man _I am," Itachi's eyebrows rose higher. "And me being gay _does not_ give you people permission to call me 'Naru-chan'," Itachi's eyebrows rose (if possible) higher. "And neither does me looking _slightly _girly." Itachi's eyebrows disappeared off his forehead. "And I just _act _dumb!"

Naruto stopped and smiled at himself for a second, then something hit him and he slapped a hand over his mouth realising what he had just said. Itachi just stared. _Naru-chan is gay? Wait, what does he mean by how much of a _man_ he is?_ Sai noticed the slightly blank face on Itachi and decided to elaborate.

"Tsunade-sama decided to tell us about how _big_ Naru-chan's di-" Once again Naruto slapped a hand over Sai's mouth, but in the process he had landed straight on top of Sai, his legs pinning the raven down. Naruto blushed and quickly hopped off, leaving Sai smirking.

"Why Naru-chan, there was no need for you to get up." Sai sat up slightly and pulled the blonde back down onto his lap. He smirked as Naruto struggled to get up, randomly throwing curses and punches in Sai's _general_ direction.

Itachi was watching with curiosity. _Well this certainly is turning out to be more interesting then I first thought._ Itachi coughed loudly and Naruto blushed as he pushed himself off Sai with a burst of speed and strength. Sai's face fell slightly at the loss of contact.

"So Naru-chan," Naruto scowled at the nickname, "You're gay? And you have a large penis?"

"Gah! Yes! Happy now?!" He glanced around the room and cowered back slightly at the amount of smirks he was receiving. "What the hell is wrong with you all?! Why are you looking at me like that?! It's creepy you know!"

"Dobe," The blonde turned around to Sasuke and almost smiled at the fact that he hadn't called him 'Naru-chan'. Then he saw Sasuke's smirk. His face fell into one of horror. He knew that smirk, and that smirk only meant trouble. "How do we _know_ that any of that is true? Prove it."

Naruto gaped. Everyone else smirked, and nodded. Except Gaara. Only his eyes showed laughter as he nodded.

"Sasuke-teme?! You guys?! What the hell?! Why should I?! Are you all gay or something?!"

Kiba raised his eyebrows.

"Honestly Naru-chan, how could you _not _realise that they were gay. Especially Neji. His hair is a dead give-away. And the ice-bitches!" He gestured towards Gaara, Sasuke and Itachi, who glared at him. "They totally brush off all the girls!"

Everyone just sat there smirking. Naruto was beginning to sweat. He _really_ didn't like this.

"So dobe," Naruto turned to Sasuke. "Are you going to prove it or am I going to have to start calling you 'Naru-chan' as well?" Sasuke smirked at this. He knew that he had the blonde trapped. Everyone else seemed to notice this as well. Their eyes twinkled.

"Teme! How the hell am I supposed to prove I'm gay?!" Sasuke looked thoughtful for a minute.

"Kiss one of them!" They all turned to the door which was now fully open. There stood Sakura and Ino, smiling a little _too _innocently. Sakura pulled out a camcorder from her backpack 'just in case someone else needed convincing'.

* * *

"Can someone explain to me _why _I'm about to prove that I'm gay?" Sakura had found a perfect spot to hold her camcorder and Naruto was standing in the middle of the room. 

"Because we said you do, dobe."

Ino was getting impatient, her inner yaoi fangirl screaming. She decided to join it.

"Hurry up and pick someone to kiss already!" She screamed. Everyone gave her a weird look before turning back to Naruto, smirking.

The blonde shuddered at the thought of kissing Sai. Gaara was a definite maybe, so was Kiba. But wouldn't kissing Kiba cause a little bit of awkwardness? Yeah, Kiba and Sai were out. Neji? He hardly knew the guy. That could be a positive though, no awkwardness. The teme was _definitely_ out. Not that Naruto didn't think the guy was hot or anything, but seriously, Sasuke-teme?! What about Itachi? _Hmm, kissing Itachi might be nice, and it'd seriously annoy Sasuke-teme_, Naruto mused. _Itachi, Gaara or Neji? Hmm, I think I'll go with option number one. Itachi it is._

Naruto smirked and pointed to Itachi. Everyone's jaw dropped. Sai was mentally screaming. Sasuke was mentally arguing with himself about how he should react. Gaara was… Gaara. Kiba was mentally crying. Neji was plotting how to get Naruto to his house.

But Itachi was… blank. For once in his life Itachi didn't know what to say… or think. He just obediently stood up. Everyone gaped at this as well… including Naruto. Itachi _wasn't_ obedient! Ever! _He must be finally having a mental breakdown_, Sasuke mused.

Sakura squealed with delight and moved Itachi to the 'perfect spot'. Naruto looked slyly up at Itachi (he was a few inches taller then our little Naru-chan) while Itachi just looked down at him with curiosity.

Sakura turned on the camcorder and nodded to Naruto. The blonde moved in but then Ino jumped in.

"Not just a peck Naru-chan! Full tongue!"

Naruto just rolled his eyes, as if it was nothing. Sakura glared at Ino for interrupting it. Ino just shrugged.

Naruto once again began to move in. Itachi obediently parted his lips slightly and leaned down a little. The blonde's pink lips captured the ravens' in a soft, chaste kiss. They heard Sakura squeal a little. Itachi could practically feel the eyes boring into him. He knew they all liked the blonde, so he decided to see how much he could get away with before one of them snapped.

Itachi slowly brought the blonde closer to him, wrapping his arms around his waist. Naruto deepened the kiss, and their tongues battled for dominance. Itachi won of course. Itachi savoured the blonde's distinct taste of honey and ramen. The two were lost in the kiss. Naruto wrapped his arms around Itachi's neck, pulling him closer. Everyone in the room stared at the pair as they kissed.

* * *

Kyuubi was stuck in a conversation with Sasori, a red-headed, pale skinned man who looked a lot like Gaara, and Deidara, a blonde-haired man who liked to blow up things. Apparently Itachi had brought them along. And the two wouldn't stop arguing! About _art _for kami's sake! The Uzumaki _really_ wanted to escape. Finally he got his chance. 

"Where's Ita-chan, Sasori?" Deidara asked, looking around a bit.

"He'll kill you if he ever hears you calling him that, but I have no clue where he is. Maybe we should go find him," the red head replied. Deidara nodded. He turned to Kyuubi, as if asking permission.

"Yeah, yeah, that's fine; I have to go find my otouto anyway." Kyuubi nodded a bit before turning and walking away a bit. He searched around the yard for a while but failed to see his otouto anywhere. _He must be inside_, Kyuubi thought.

* * *

"Damn Uchiha, must've gone inside without us. He always ditches us at parties when he sees something 'interesting'." Sasori complained. They had searched the whole of the outside and hadn't found Itachi anywhere. 

"Honestly, he sounds way too much like that snake Orochimaru, un." Deidara scowled. "Oh well, lets go find him then."

Kyuubi had gone straight upstairs, in the direction of Naruto's room, where he found Sasori and Deidara. _Ugh, I thought I escaped them._

"Can't find Itachi then?" Kyuubi asked, _trying_ to be polite.

Deidara shook his head.

"We've looked everywhere except up here, un."

Sasori nodded in agreement.

"Can't find your otouto?"

Kyuubi shook his head.

"I've looked everywhere as well. They must be in there together. I didn't see Sasuke anywhere either. Or his friends. _Or _the girls who are always clinging to Sasuke."

Deidara nodded.

"Oh well, lets see what they're up to."

Kyuubi nodded and pushed the door open. The three gasped at the sight. Itachi and Naruto kissing. Sakura and Ino filming. Sasuke, Gaara, Neji and Kiba glaring daggers at Itachi.

Sakura turned around and jumped, quickly turning off the camera. Sasuke turned around, spotted Deidara and groaned. Itachi and Naruto broke apart, spinning around to see what was going on. Sasuke was now slightly thankful for Deidara's, Kyuubi's and Sasori's arrival.

Naruto first spotted his brother's eyes. Their normal black was now tinted red. Kyuubi was angry. Very angry. _But why?_ Naruto thought. _Oh, right, heh, he doesn't know I'm gay. Woopsie daisy._

Kyuubi pushed past the girls, grabbed Naruto by the ear, and dragged him out of the room. Deidara pushed past the girls and grabbed Itachi by the ear and began dragging him, only to be pushed onto the ground.

"What the hell Deidara?!" Itachi growled angrily.

The blonde rubbed the back of his neck as he stood up.

"Heh, sorry Ita-san, got caught up in the moment, un."

Itachi, Sasuke and Sasori all rolled their eyes. Then Sasori spoke up.

"What was that that we walked in on?" He glanced at the girls who were now surveying the tape on the camcorder before glancing at the sofa where the others sat.

"Well Sasuke-kun told Naru-chan to prove that he was gay, and that he had a big dick and Naruto was in the process of proving he was gay when you three burst in and ruined our video." Ino grumbled. Sasori shot her an evil glare.

"So that's all it was then?" Sasori asked.

Itachi nodded his head slightly, though he knew better. Sasuke, Gaara, Kiba, Sai and Neji however took this to mean that Itachi didn't like their little Naru-chan and felt like cheering.

"Good, come downstairs, Shizune's serving out the _real_ food. About time I say; I was getting really sick of those chips."

Itachi nodded then began following his friends out the door. He remembered the look on his brother's face when Naruto had chosen _him_. That look had made his day.

* * *

"Why the _fuck_ were you _kissing_ Itachi?!" Kyuubi all but yelled. He had dragged the blonde into the lounge. 

The blonde had no clue how to answer his brother. Would Kyuubi be angry if he told him he was gay? Tsunade and Jiraiya had taken it well, but then again, they are both mental. Kyuubi wouldn't stop looking at him. Maybe he had better just get it over with.

"I'm gay." Naruto looked at Kyuubi's face, searching for any sign that he should run away and hide, but it never came.

"Yes, I _know_ that! _Why_ were you kissing _Itachi _though?! He is like, creepy, and sadistic, and so much _older_ then you! _And_ he is _Sasuke's_ brother!"

Naruto stared at Kyuubi. _How could he know? Even Kiba didn't know I was gay. _

"H-how did... y-yy-" Naruto swore at his stuttering.

"Heh, Tsunade told me while she was drunk once." Kyuubi rubbed the back of his neck.

"Stupid old hag and her drinking; she promised me she wouldn't tell anyone!" the blonde grumbled.

"Yeah. Now, why the hell were you kissing Itachi?!?!"

"Heh, funny thing that," Kyuubi raised an eyebrow at Naruto. "Fine! Tsunade-baa-chan told them, Sasuke, Gaara, Neji, Sai and Kiba, that I am gay, and that I have a huge penis," Kyuubi raised the other eyebrow. "And I needed to talk to the others in private so I took them to my room and Itachi kind of followed us-"

"Yeah, whatever, I don't care! Why were you kissing Itachi?!" The red head grabbed Naruto's shoulders and shook him. The younger Uzumaki pushed away from his brother.

"Geez, I'm getting to that! Sasuke-teme wanted proof that I was gay and that I had a huge penis, so he told me to kiss someone in the group to prove it and I chose Itachi to piss off the teme. I think it worked too 'cause he looked really angry. I think he was trying to hide it though. It made him look kinda constipated…" Naruto trailed off.

"So you don't like Itachi like _that_ then?"

"No," Kyuubi let out a sigh. "Well, at least I don't _think_ I do; he was a really good kisser." Kyuubi's eyes widened, and then he fainted.

* * *

It's done!  
THIS IS IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!  
I have a poll on my page about which fic I should update next! Please vote! Also, when you are reviewing (and you'd better review!) please tell me who you would like our little Naru-chan to end up with!


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